Category Archives: pregnancy

I’m cryin’ cryin’

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So, towards the end of my pregnancy, I struggled with how to explain birth to my three-year old son.

Since Behbez positioning (breech and transverse) pretty much guaranteed a c-section, I wondered how to make him understand how the whole “Behbez in Muhmez tummeh” –> “Behbez outta Muhmez tummeh” would happen.

But, you know, without freaking him out.

I decided on a YouTube video.

Relax.

The one I found was relatively bloodfree.  No screams.  No showing of the actual incision.  Just a Mom’s-Eye-View of Behbez coming out over the hill of the stomach.

Gabe was fascinated – asking questions in his barely coherent way.

“Behbez outta Muhmez tummeh?”

and

“I holda Behbez?”

Everything went downhill, however, when the cords were cut.

“Booboo, Muhmeh!”

No, hon.  It doesn’t hurt.

“Booboo Behbez!”

It’s okay, love.

“No, Muhmeh!  Behbez booboo PENIS!”

Whaa?

“Booboo penis!”

Shit.

“Penis GONE!”

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Now, I’m telling you this, not only to make you feel better about your own stellar parenting moments, but also so that when Gabe pulls a Buffalo Bill, the team of Forensic Psychologists sent to study him can pinpoint the exact moment it all went horribly wrong.

Sweet Nothings

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While watching Kung-Fu Panda – the part when Crane mocks Poe for not being able to see his feet – the Love of My Life comments:

Husband:  Remind you of anyone?

Me:  (Sprawled out on the couch, looking down over my enormously pregnant belly)  What are you talking about?  I can totally see my feet.

Husband:  Yeah, but can you see your snatch?

Me: Not without a mirror.

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And after a comment like that, neither will he.

12 weeks

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So, it’s been three weeks since we found out that our sprout had company.

The shock has mostly worn off.

Okay, we’re still reeling.

All I can say is:  There better be at least one girl in there, because there is no way I’m sticking around in a household of four men.

My sister-in-law assures me that I have a 75% chance of having at least one girl  (25% g/g, 25% b/b, 50% b/g, for those interested) so that makes me a little happier.

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I’m HUGE already.

With Gabe, I barely needed mat clothes until well into my 5th month.  With Thing 1 and Thing 2, I’ve been in stretchy pants for weeks.

See?

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Granted, some of it is chub, but MOST is baby…s.

I’m still getting used to talking in plural forms.

I’ve already seen my midwife twice, but unfortunately, it looks like that relationship will be limited this go-round.

Apparently, multiple births are considered high-risk and as such, my midwives have to differ to an OB.

Not only that, but my desire for a homebirth as given way to giving birth, not only in a hospital, but in an O.R.

I’m finding this pretty tough.  I already feel completely out of control when it comes to this pregnancy and it looks like I’m going to have a similar amount of control when it comes to my birth plan.

*sigh*

I’m hoping that if this pregnancy is picture perfect, the OB will be willing to sit quiet in a corner while my midwives deliver me.

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$10 Quilt – March Block

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So, I got my next $10 Quilt Block done in the nick of time.

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What with all the hormones and the nausea and the holy-crap-I’m-tired, I haven’t really been interested in anything but not puking.

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It was my first time sewing curves, so that’s cool.  You never know when you’ll need to pull that skill out of your bat tool belt.

Much like my ability to plot the perfect sine wave.

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I changed it a little from the original (below) for no other reason other than I could.  I don’t know that I like it any better, but as I’m praying tulips will soon show their pretty faces, I’m happy with the result.

I don’t know that I really consider appliqué  ‘real quilting’, however, and as we’ve already use that technique twice, I’m pretty much over it.

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